Oprah told us it was the most important story on the planet.

I distinctly remember that phrase because I thought to myself, “Wow! That’s a big statement. She’ll probably do a whole month of shows on this.” Nope. That was the only show on it. One of the shows that followed it was the interview with Tom Cruise where he jumped up on the couch, and professed his love for some woman …I can’t remember her name. No follow-up show was ever done …on the most important story on the planet.

My point? The Bird Flu story was, indeed, NOT the most important story on the planet. In fact, nobody even remembers it, now. But we got awfully emotional over it for a while. We hugged our kids tighter and worried for our collective futures. After all …the Bush administration wasn’t doing ANYTHING to stop the Bird Flu. And that was borderline criminally negligent, given the circumstances.

The outrage over the Bird Flu was a classic case of drumming up something over which people could get angry and mobilized. Nothing more. The truth is none of us really knew anything about the Bird Flu. OPRAH didn’t know anything about the Bird Flu. The Bird Flu wasn’t any more of a threat than any other flu. But it pitted the sides against each other perfectly …for a few minutes. And sometimes, a few minutes is all you need.

Right now, the current outrage is the children being ripped out of their parents’ arms, on the southern border. My God! I am heartbroken! Okay, maybe not dramatically heartbroken …But I’m interested …let’s put it that way. How can I be so cruel and unfeeling? Because truthfully, I don’t really know what’s going on down there. And truthfully …neither do you.

I’m not as interested in the laws or the Trump policy or, believe it or not, what’s actually happening on the southern border, as I am in the responses to it. As I understand this situation, illegal alien parents, and their innocent children, are being processed separately, when they attempt to come into the country without documentation or a Visa or a passport or a work permit. Is the United States handling this the best way it could be handling it? I have no idea. Maybe not. Or maybe it’s doing an incredible job, given the circumstances. I honestly don’t know. And again …neither do you.

But the hand wringing and cyber tears and cries from the souls of those who just know “this is not US!” is what I’m focussed on. See, if Americans were really incensed about children being torn away from their parents, they would be out in force at every custody hearing, in every courthouse in America. Children are systematically ripped away from dads in this country every second, of every minute of every hour of every day. We’re pretty okay with babies crying for daddy and being taken away from him. Hey, just because he’s out of work or an alcoholic or he cheated on mom or he occasionally loses his temper and hits mom …should those things make a difference? I mean we’re talking about taking kids away from a parent. Right?

What about when mom is on crack and a baby is taken away from her and put into the system? Shouldn’t we get nauseous over that? Okay …maybe that’s a bad example. How bout this? How about when a girl gives a baby up for adoption in …oh …I dunno …Florida, let’s say. In Florida, a birth mother has thirty days to change her mind about giving up her child. So, are there cameras there on day 28, when a baby is ripped from its adoptive mother’s arms and given back to birth mom, who now thinks she can kick heroin once and for all? Do these people nearly faint with indignation then?

The United States government takes children away from parents EVERY. SINGLE. DAY, for any number of reasons and any number of existing laws. Right now, one of those reasons happens to be trying to enter the country illegally. Would I do it that way? I don’t know. I’m not privy to all the facts. Maybe I would or maybe I wouldn’t. Again, that’s not really the point.

What I DO know is my fingerprints and personality profile are on file at the FBI. If I screw up a little too badly, the United States can walk into my house and remove my adopted children without so much as a “nice kitchen.” They told us as much back when we were being processed. I would only hope all the protesters would come to my defense and help me get my kids back. But if Trump was doing something else someone decided to hate, I doubt they would bother.

The problem with a situation like this is that it’s a flashpoint for everyone’s political ire. And that makes it all worse.

And it doesn’t help when our stupid attorney General (who should be fired for a myriad of reasons, by the way) starts quoting scripture in defense of the most damning photo campaign since Abu Ghraib. Stop using Jesus for either side of this. Jesus didn’t work for the government and he didn’t have to deal with eighty thousand illegal border crossings.

This is a processing issue. Period. It’s not a referendum on anyone’s faith or lack thereof. If I hear one more person tell me how a “real Christian” should feel or think about this, I’m going to surf internet porn and drink whiskey and play my rock and roll records backwards until the evil spirits overtake me. I don’t care about how you think I should feel. I don’t care what you think Jesus would do. I don’t care how horrible you think Donald Trump is. The bottom line is YOU don’t really care about families getting torn apart anymore than Republicans care about terminally ill people being forced off of life support. You just need to feel like you’re on the side of the angels. You just need to feel like you’re outraged by the right thing.

If you are seriously crying and having a hard time eating, go to the border and offer to take in a child. Sponsor a family to come here legally. Lobby for laws in your state that shrink grace periods for birth mothers. That’s what I do. See, I actually know kids who were ripped out of homes. I know adoptive parents who’s babies were born and then the birth mothers skipped town the day after they held their children for the first time. Those aren’t just pictures to me. I know what it means. The difference is, those children on the border will most likely be reunited with their parents once the processing is over. It’s temporary. The stories I’m talking about are permanent. And no protestors marched for those families. because they weren’t a cause de jour, and they weren’t simple scenarios to direct outrage toward. They were complicated matters, just like I’m sure a lot of these cases on the border are.

If children remaining with families is your real passion, get involved right in your city …right now. Otherwise, this is just another reason for you to either defend Trump or hate Trump and these kids are nothing more than your own personal soap box to stand on. And next week, they will be discarded, because there will be a different outrage. And we will have all moved on.

And all of this urgency will vanish into the same place every other news story vanishes into …the hole where the Bird Flu lives.



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  1. You said what I believe and better than I could. You have experience so it does give more value to what you say. My family were legal immigrants that are naturalized citizens. I feel I have a right to an opinion that isn’t so popular right now. Thank you for letting me share this to get my point across to those that are suffering from this faux outrage.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This is so true. If I took my kids on a journey like the parents from wherever, South America are doing and CPS found out they would take them from me in a heart beat and all the “this is so cruel” commentators would state I had it coming.


  3. I was thinking these thoughts almost verbatim today when I received the oh so urgent request to call my governor and demand they support legislation to stop these separations. Temporary separations. I appreciate your blog so much, because I am often relieved to know I’m not the only person who thinks these things! peace, JenM


  4. Kids are taken from parents in America. Sometimes it is perfectly right and justified for the sake of the child. Sometimes it is a mistake and not necessary or good at all. But we are all just humans here. We all mess up and make wrong decisions. Because we don’t know enough, don’t care enough? Because we are sinners in need of salvation. That is life. We make decisions without knowing for sure if our decision is the right one. Nevertheless, we are required to make decisions every day anyway, and we are responsible for them too, the good ones and the bad ones. So I make the decision that taking children away from their mothers because the mothers are fleeing into America for safety is a wrong decision. It is too hard on the young children and it is unnecessary. I don’t know all the facts. I am not there. I could be wrong, but I don’t think so. I think ” tender age children” , as the administration calls them, can be severely damaged by this. I think they must suffer much and lasting damage can be done to them. And I think it is not a logical, practical, necessary thing to do. It would surely serve as well to have these large warehouse places house the parents and the children together until their fate is decided. It can’t cost less to do it this way. It seems much more humane. So I make the decision to speak out and say the government is doing wrong. Not a popular thing to do among many of my friends and family, but still what I really think. And if I really think it wrong, I need to say so because our government gets its right to govern from the people. So, then, I may be wrong, but I don’t think so, I think the government is wrong, and I say so. My right and my duty. Also my right and duty to listen to people who think this policy is right and should continue, and to try my best to understand how and why they decide very differently.


  5. eh, thanks. Something about this whole business feels fishy to me, like manufactured outrage. I’m glad to hear I’m not the only one. My social media is going nuts. Well, actually mostly the same 4 or 5 people, over and over again. Like you I definitely don’t know everything that’s going on and maybe I’m a heartless bastard but I’m not comfortable joining the chorus on this one.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. For the most part I agree with you.

    Children are taken away from their parents in the US every day for all kinds of existing laws. Some laws are good, some bad, some questionable.
    I hate it and it hurts my heart because in almost every case we know the child will carry something negative… inside… for the rest of his life.

    I do strongly disagree with what has been going on at the border with the separating of the children from their parents. There is no law that covers that!

    You say they crossed the border illegally. Some did. Some came to the border seeking asylum which is legal to do. The law of that is broken is a federal misdemeanor. That is the same as transporting a water hyacinth. It says nothing about taking babies, children away from their parents when people are looking for a better life. So I realize they are not doing this anymore. But getting the families that were already separated back together??? How exactly is that going to happen? How fast is that going to happen ???? These people are now spread all over the US… Are you sure they will all be reunited?

    So the big answer is they shouldn’t be trying to come into “our” country…. You have children; I have children. If I lived in Honduras one of the most dangerous places in the world now, I thought I had a chance to get to the US or watch them die at home I know what I would do. How about you?

    I hope you and your family have a long happy life!


  7. Oh how I have missed your thoughts and your words, Regie. Been buried in moving chaos. Caught up at just the right time. I have been beyond frustrated with the reports, comments, protests and politicizing of the illegal immigrant situation. I have turned off the radio and television dozens of times because I cannot stand yet more of it. I agree with every word you wrote!! It is truly disgusting and stupid to protest for the “cause du jour” only to move along to the next reason to march around and wave signs sans any understanding or honest concern. Keep talking, Regie!!


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